Getting it Together

In one of my favorite scenes in the movie "Bridget Jones's Diary," Bridget (Renee Zellweger) is going on "a full-blown minibreak holiday" with her boyfriend Daniel Cleaver (Hugh Grant). As they set off on their English countryside adventure in Daniel's convertable, Bridget, having a moment of glamour in an elegant headscarf and large sunglasses, says that she feels, "like a screen goddess, in the manner of Grace Kelly." But then she throws her head back into the wind, and her fancy headscarf goes flying off. When she shows up at their countryside destination, her hair is matted and windblown, sticking straight up out of her head. So elegant.

Maybe one of the reasons I love that movie so much is because that's totally something I would do. My own elegant, prepared for anything, with-it moments are always ruined somehow by my inelegance and clumsiness (and in some cases, downright stupidity). Most of the time I feel like I just can't quite get it together. Or, as Bridget says in the film, "it seems as though when one area of your life is going spectacularly, another falls spectacularly flat."

This morning, for example. Despite having to send out a search party to locate my husband's keys at 6:30 this morning (they were in the garage), I actually got out the front door on time. My clothes were ironed for a change, my hair was cooperating nicely despite the cold, my snacks and water for work had been packed the night before. But then I stepped outside to find my car windows covered in ice, and my morning began to unravel. I found myself thinking, "dammit, I forgot to buy an ice-scraper!" for the third time this week. In a pinch, I used my Harris Teeter VIC card to scrape the ice off my windows (it works, don't knock it!), but by the time I got around to the back window, my fingers were frozen solid in my (hole-filled) soaking wet gloves.

Naturally, I needed coffee to warm them up. Last day of work this week - perfect day for a Starbucks treat, right? So I climbed in my now ice-free car and rolled to Starbucks for my weekly Mocha. But, I managed to park in a space that was covered in glass, on which I slipped getting out of the car. Once I got inside and ordered, I proceeded to spill the entire contents of my purse all over the floor, scrambling around on my hands and knees and bumping into my fellow caffeine-craving patrons as I picked it all up. When I got my mocha, I promtply spilled some of it on myself. Of course, it was extra-hot. I nearly got into an accident getting onto I-40. Then I got to the parking lot at work (where I actually got a good space for a change) in time to watch the bus drive away to leave me waiting in the cold for the next one. I stumbled into work 15-minutes late, covered in coffee, hair now frizzy and windblown, gloves soaking wet, and wishing I were back at home in my warm pajamas watching brain-rotting morning television.

It's like Hubris and Nemisis are always playing tricks with me. I get it together in one area and my self-confidence goes up, only to be knocked away spectacularly when I come unraveled. Some days I feel like Super Mommy - I wake up, get my boys and myself out the door on-time, go through the daily work-gym-dinner-bedtime juggling act, and fall into bed with a smile on my face. Only to wake up the next day and realize my clothes aren't ironed, my keys are nowhere to be found, and I forgot to make coffee the night before.

I envy those "together" women who seem to never falter. You know the ones I'm talking about - the ladies with perfect manicures who never have lipstick on their coffee cups (or their teeth), whose clothes always match, shoes are never scuffed, hose always without runs. They're always armed with the answer to every question, a witty comeback at exactly the right moment, and they carry themselves with enviable ease, elegance, and grace. Do they ever have Bridget Jones moments? Or do they just cover them up better than the rest of us?

As I construct my "50 Things About Myself" list (challenge #2), one of my "Improve Myself" items is to work on my "with-it-ness." Maybe one day someone might find me one of those "together women." But, to even it out, another of those 50 items is to learn to embrace the imperfections. I may have more loveably goofy Bridget Jones moments than the average woman, but the truth is that we all have them. And maybe the most "together" women are the ones who can have the clumsy moments and still hold their heads up smiling.

Here's to remembering that the next time I glide into a room like Grace Kelly, only to trip over the doorframe like Bridget.